Two Inches of Armageddon postpones Alabama vs Auburn
By Joe Nardone
Mandatory Credit: Joe Camporeale-USA TODAY Sports
It’s apparently two-inches of Armageddon down south. Someone send Bruce Willis and the new Batman down there as quickly as possible. I mean it is already altering certain aspects of life down there. One of them being the Alabama Crimson Tide and their game against the Auburn Tigers.
Since that area can’t handle a few inches (get your mind out of the gutter, kids), the game has been postponed.
To be fair, the southern parts of these particular United States (are there others?) aren’t really equipped to handle snow. Still, I am not sure that is a good reason for my Twitter timeline to make it look like they are being over-run with zombies or something.
The game has been changed to Thursday, 25 minutes after the women’s game is over. That game is slated to tip-off at 5 pm.
Here is what I am trying to say. Please, someone send help to the that area and please bring some scientists with you. They are apparently in the middle of Two Inches of Doom with no hope in sight.
We are praying for you, people who are confused by snow. Granted, we are barely — in a sarcastic, condescending way as well — praying for you. But we are, kinda.
Okay. We’re not.